Transgender and counseling

TRANSGENDER AND COUNSELING

TRANSGENDER AND COUNSELING

For a person struggling with gender issues counseling can be a bewildering experience. While educated and sensitive counseling can be supportive and valuable, many transgendered individuals have been misunderstood, manipulated, and abused by counselors. Some counseling continues to promise a "cure" for transgender tendencies, unethically exploiting the vulnerability of people desperate to find peace in a complex and disturbing predicament. Some counselors assure a prospective transgendered client that they have experience in working with these issues when they have actually had little or none—in a misguided belief that transgender issues are like any other existential life questions. There are even a few counselors—under the aegis of religion—that promise help but actually provide mind controlling and even abusive techniques in an attempt to fulfill religious dictum. Some counselors with massive credentials seem to work poorly with transgender folk even though they may have been providing this care for some time, while other counselors with few credentials seem to be highly effective. And then there is the new question to face, to talk to a counselor who transgendered her/himself or to one who is not transgendered?

Qualities of an Effective Counselor

about diagnosis…
There are many benefits that effective counseling can offer. An experienced counselor should be able to fairly quickly help you distinguish between transgender and a mental disorder that appears to be transgender but is actually not. This should not take six months or three months or even (usually) one month to do. An experienced therapist should be able to provide an evaluation (with or without supportive testing) in from one to six hours of work. Additional time needed for evaluation should be provided only with a clear explanation of why the additional time is required. Therapists who string transgender clients along for months and even years in an endless quest to discover the "correct" diagnosis are at best practicing unethically and at worst being greedy and opportunistic. They would not even consider treating a non-transgender client in this manner.

about considering challenges…
An effective counselor should be able to assist a transgendered person in considering the implications of gender transition, neither encouraging nor discouraging the person as they make life changing decisions. For this the counselor must have adequate experience with the requirements, pitfalls, challenges, and questions the individual is likely to face in a transition process. The counselor must also be comfortable with assisting individuals with potentially disturbing life decisions.

and finding competent resources…
An effective gender counselor should be able to assist the individual in finding other resources—medical, paramedical, legal, deportment, speech, wardrobe, financial, etc.—that will assist in whatever transition process the client has chosen. While the counselor should and would not provide information related to costs of these services (and should not benefit financially by referring you), relative costs and requirements should be available. For instance, a gender counselor should be able to help a client in making the decision between the various types of permanent facial and body hair removal (electrolysis, thermolysis or blend, waxing, epilite, laser, etc.).

TRANSGENDER AND COUNSELING

and deciding on alternatives…
A gender counselor should also be able to assist individuals in exploring realistic alternatives to gender transition. This requires creativity, flexibility, and the capacity to envision resolution when there seems to be no good answer. This can also result in the need for ongoing supportive counseling for lengthy periods of time, perhaps the remainder of the lifespan. Counselors who can only focus on short-term solution oriented therapies are not good candidates. Unfortunately this is precisely the current trend in counseling.

for families…
Some counselors are equipped to provide marital and family counseling services, either themselves or through professional associates to help spouse, parents, children and other family members deal with the changes that are occurring or will occur. An increasing number of couples in married or committed relationships are electing to stay together during and even after a gender transition. A gender therapist should be able to provide support to the couple and the family system. In cases where the couple are separating the therapist should also be able to be supportive and assist in locating legal and financial advice.

TRANSGENDER AND COUNSELING

About the Author

Tushar Virani